Because Iyanla’s Busy [Things I Do to Fix My Life]

I’m about folks dealing with their issues, letting go of their demons, and moving on with their lives. I think it’s one of the healthiest things we as humans can do for ourselves outside of talking and fellowshipping with God. If you’ve never heard of Iyanla, she’s a life counselor (or at least that’s what I call her) who has a show on O.W.N. where she is invited by different people to help them fix their lives and work through their issues. Now I do realize since she’s doing this on TV it has an exploitative element to it; but after watching a couple episodes I believe she’s doing more good than harm in most of these people’s lives and honestly watching her talk to a son whose father wasn’t good to him I learned a few things I need to do to realign a few broken relationships in my life. Not gonna lie, once folks have their breakthroughs on Iyanla Fix My Life I be like this (after I stop weeping from joy and struggle):

Granted, Iyanla isn’t for everyone, she does talk in abstracts and calls folks beloved and uses a lot of metaphors and spiritual discussion and I know that may annoy some people (i.e. my mama, folks who hate green smoothie drinking, tea sipping people who sit on lawns and meditate) but I think she really does help folks rectify brokenness in their lives. Well since she’s famous, and I know she wouldn’t come fix my life if I asked her anyways, I decided to make a list of things I do to keep myself centered and balanced and healthy and away from sitting by the dock of the bay, sipping a forty, while shouting my sorrow to the ducks swimming by. I’m sure some of these seem common sense but you probably already know a lot of things make sense in theory and are completely MIA when it comes to enacting them in practice.

Get Out of the Habit of Speaking About Things I Really Don’t Know Anything About

I’ve always said that I do this but not until recently have I taken this more seriously. Since I’m in graduate school I spend most of my time writing papers and making arguments that have to be validated by some sort of credibility. I’ve learned that you really do need concrete support for everything you speak out into the universe or else you’ll get dragged for filth when someone challenges you.

Example:

“Women shouldn’t walk out alone at night because it’s dangerous and they need men to protect them otherwise they’ll get attacked and die.”

This statement is probably said with all good intentions but statistics show that women are way more likely to get attacked in the home by someone they know than they are to be randomly assaulted and murdered on the street. Men are more likely to be attacked in public space.

Also, don’t make brash generalizations based on something some one guy in your class or some woman on this one blog said without researching it to see if its true. If you don’t know anything about mid-twentieth century Islam in Iran don’t say anything about mid-twentieth century Islam in Iran. Hearsay is the language of the uninformed. Don’t be uninformed, we have way too much access to information for folks to be walking around ignorant. Also, people have an opinion about everything and folks have no problem sharing that opinion or why they believe your statement is wrong with you and you need to be able to back up everything you say. So if you posted some statistic on Facebook or some controversial opinion/belief you have, be prepared to defend your statement.

Going To Peaceful Places Frequently 

I love the park. And the ocean. And really peaceful places in nature. Going to these places really help me just relax and get a better view on life. Also it gives me an opportunity to view God’s greatest work, nature, and it reminds of all the pleasant and beautiful things in life. I never feel free-er than when I’m sitting on my balcony with the breeze caressing my face while I’m sipping on a delicious green smoothie. Sometimes peaceful places aren’t all that quiet.

Back when I still lived at home in NOLA, I used to love sitting on my front porch during a huge festival called Jazz Fest. All the businesses around my house would have their radios and speakers outside and there was all kinds of music blaring from everywhere and there were people walking to and fro sipping daiquiris and enjoying themselves. That place was just as peaceful and relaxing as sitting in the forest (and yes Black folks do like forests and water and nature and stuff).

Not Dismissing Folks

I have a HORRID habit of completely ignoring and dismissing folks once I’ve decide they are no longer worthy of my attention. And that’s bad. You can’t just silence folks because you just decided you don’t want to bothered with them anymore. Silencing people is a powerful thing and it’s harmful. Now if someone is rude to me or is dragging on a disagreement that won’t be resolved any time soon then I find it best to say “look we’re clearly not getting anything new accomplished here so we need to just agree to disagree” and leave it at that. Now if they keep going, well that’s they’re problem but I find it that people appreciate it when you hear them out and just sit and listen to them for a bit.

I also found that you HAVE to give folks multiple chances (unless they are unapologetically racist, sexist, elitist, blasphemous, etc.) to express themselves. Just because someone once said something you didn’t like or a couple of years ago did something that rubbed you the wrong way doesn’t mean everything they say or do is completely wrong or stupid. Humans are multi-dimensional and folks make mistakes, you gotta give folks a chance before you completely write them off.

Taking Proper Care of My Body

This one is pretty obvious but I recently started being very intentional about what goes into my body and how I treat it and the results are INSANE. I feel better overall, I now know what works to give me energy and I’m actually much better at focusing my energies on one thing. This past week I had two 15 page minimum papers due and a final to take on the same day. Three different things due on the same day and you think I stressed? Heck no I didn’t, I simply kept exercising, drinking my green smoothies, taking some time to let my brain relax and I was able to get everything done with little to no stress. Anxiety is unhealthy. You will give your body all kinds of unnecessary problems.

Receive Compliments With Open Arms

I think I’ve been socialized to appear humble when receiving compliments and say things like “oh no, it’s not really me” or  ”oh it’s really no big deal” when someone compliments my work or my looks. And as a nice as that may seem, I think it does more harm than good. It makes it seem like you don’t think you deserve the compliment plus it slick dismisses the person giving it. Unless you truly are unworthy of the compliment because you stole the idea or someone else did it. For example, if you are in art class and you just so happen to be standing in front of a work of art with a paintbrush in your hand because you were headed to the other side of the room to work on your own ‘not as awesome’ piece of art and then someone walks past and says “Hey great work of art, you are brilliant and should be given a plethora of awards for your brilliance” This is an situation where you get to deny a compliment. Otherwise, just take the compliment.

BUT…

This doesn’t mean you have to do a victory lap every single time someone gives you the slightest compliment. Don’t be this guy.

This is completely unnecessary

Otherwise say thank you, take the compliment, and accept the little confidence boost and keep it moving. It’s much simpler than feigning humility or denying the brilliance that is inside of you. Because we are all brilliant if you didn’t know it.

Rejecting Other Folks Negativity

I am not worrier! I hate being around worrier. Especially people who just love to sit and talk about how much anxiety they have and why everything in your life is falling into a cataclysm of self-destruction. Also, there are people who will believe you are going to fail no matter what you do. Those people get this from me…

While you are worrying I am frolicking in peace

I refuse to indulge anxiety or entertaining anyone stomping on my dreams. It’s unhealthy and CONTAGIOUS and literally produces nothing! Even Jesus spoke against worrying when he sad “Can any one of you add a single hour to your life by worrying?” You produce nothing by just sitting and worrying, you just gotta go and do whatever is freaking you out and get it out the way. Otherwise you will just give yourself a migraine and still not have done anything productive.

Well that’s it! Any other tips you have to keep yourself centered and in your zen? I’d love to hear them!

P.S. I am now actually using my Youtube channel so go check that out too! Right now there’s hair and makeup stuff, because I love those things, but don’t fear there will soon be some current events/ponderings videos also so I’d love your support!! If you like what you see, then subscribe, tell your friends, and like my videos. If you don’t like what you see well, just don’t say anything..at all. -_-

Peace and Love,

-Bri aka Briizy aka @kewl_briize aka msbribap on Instagram and Brini Weenie

“All of the people saw it. Then they fell down flat with their faces toward the ground. They cried out,”The Lord is the one and only God! The Lord is the one and only God!”-1 Kings 18:39 

 

Fairy Tales and White Supremacists (and other necessary evils)

I doubt there’s any one who would argue that reality tv is of benefit to society. Actually it’ll be much easier to count the people who would make this argument than it would to count the people that oppose it. Yet, reality show after reality show keeps popping up on the television. It done got so bad they have started making funeral based reality shows. Y’all they started making shows about people’s funerals. We are so willing to watch anything that the people in the shows don’t even have to be alive any more!

Y’all Stop.

Anyways, there’s a reason reality shows keep getting made and why people keep watching. A major reason is because people like feeling better about themselves by looking at people who are worse off than them because it’s VERY easy to feel great when you’re comparing yourself to this:

Look at all that promise

Even though the Lord calls us to not compare ourselves to each other, we still do it and we do it in the biggest way by watching reality tv…which is why reality tv is still on and I deem it a necessary evil. It’s in no way, shape, or form good, but we (and when I say we I mean America) still hold it close to us so that we can feel that at least our lives aren’t that bad. So here are a few other things we keep around because they serve some other sheisty purpose.

Overt Racists

We all know how to spot an obvious racist. All you have to do is listen to Rush Limbaugh or Donald Trump or google the Klan or just google racist tweets and you will find thousands upon thousands of overtly racist things being said whether it’s calling the President a monkey or somebody whining about how Trayvon Martin in the end really was a thug. Either way it’s not hard to tell who is not here for the Blacks and Hispanics. Overt racists serve another purpose other than just annoying the living crap out of most people; they are also the perfect way to hide racism in its most insidious form which is by its institutionalization. So as long as Billy Bob and ‘em are running around screaming “WHITE POWER”, the racists who killed Trayvon Martin, Jordan Davis, and Kimani Gray can always say at least we ain’t lynching y’all no more…

To y’all i say:

Please do.

The Romanticization of the Past

In one of my classes a fellow brother in the struggle said the reason Blacks aren’t where they should be is because we haven’t come together like we used to back in the day. And if only we did that now then we wouldn’t be discriminated against and we could all prance around the United States enjoying all types of happy Black unopposed freedom. As awesome as the Civil Rights Movement was, not every one was on board. Martin Luther King Jr was stabbed by a Black woman who felt he was ‘”stirring up too much trouble.” Oh that sounds lovely.

Same goes for people who believe the 50s housewife life was just the best thing ever. For one, only middle class white women lived that life and they were so bored out of their minds that some turned into alcoholics and prescription pill addicts. Two, most women were cleaning the houses of or watching the kids of these oh so bored housewives, so yeah I, as a Black middle class, mildly educated woman, am not about that life. Or people who refer to the Pre-Civil War days as the “good ol’ days”. Yes, that hard labor picking cotton and perpetually trying not to be raped by master was such a wonderful time had by all! -_-

We have to stop romanticizing past days and automatically assuming life was so much better then. The major purpose of romanticization of the past is to distract you from doing real work on the present. If you spend most of your time hoping and wishing to get things back to the way they were you will do nothing but move your cause backwards…literally. Your cause will be going backwards. Focus on the now and plan a better future.

The Illusion of Change

This is also referred to as mimetic reform which means “measures that respond to insurgent demands without devolving real power or redistributing significant resources” (Katz 87).  Basically promising change and not really doing it. Good example would be if you and your homies saw an injustice, like homeless people gathering near a wall in your neighborhood, and you talk to those homeless people and discover the reasons that lead to their poverty (poor post war rehabilitation, absurd debt, drug dependencies that were never properly treated) and so you and your friends start writing letters and protesting and marching and the whole city jumps on board. FINALLY, the mayor does a press conference and says we’re going to do something about the astounding amount of homeless people in these streets, we’re going to help them get back on their feet. So you and your friends are satisfied that you got come change going! All the people who protested with you go back to their homes feeling accomplished and like they can be the change they want to see in the world.

Days later, you go back to that wall just to check and see how many homeless people have been taken to shelters and how many have begun the process of being rehabilitated back into society and you notice that the exact same people that were there the first time you went are still there…except now they have tents and blankets. Was something done? Yes. Was it enough? By no means. The illusion of change has one purpose: to keep the angry mob calm and to make it seem as if they’ve gotten what they wanted but in the end not much has changed.

Someone To Point The Finger At (i.e. the poor)

A couple of nights ago i saw a post on Instagram about those on welfare and I got so angry that there may have been steam coming out of my ears. Now granted, this was sort of my fault because I was on Instagram in the first place, and that social media outlet is the single most out of order and ratchet piece of media I have ever encountered. Folks put all kinds of things on IG and don’t give two flying flips what you, their professors, or their employers think about it!

Weed is illegal?

Why of course I’ll post multiple pictures of me smoking and consuming all kinds of other frowned upon substances. But the coonery of Instagram is it’s own post…back to what I was saying.

I saw a post about people on welfare having to take drug tests and how the states that have done this were “eliminating worthless leeches from our society”. Yes, because poor people aren’t letting America be great. Not war, not terrorism, not racism, not sexism, but poor people and their poverty and their need for help are the reason why American is hemorrhaging money like it’s a 2009 automotive executive. The poor are such an easy scapegoat for America’s problems that it’s comical to even say it any more. So to the guy who created that IG post:

Several seats for you too

Anyways that’s all I got! What y’all think? Any other necessary evils you all can think of that exist and persist? I’d love to hear them.

-Brini Weenie aka the NOLA rat aka @kewl_briize

“But suppose you suffer for being a Christian. Then don’t be ashamed. Instead, praise God because you are known by that name”- 1 Peter 4:16

P.S.-I’m rolling out something new soon so I can’t wait to share it with all y’all!!!

 

Egyptians are Africans…because Egypt is in Africa [and other things the general populace needs to know]

As I peruse the various corners of the interwebs (which I spend entirely too much time doing as opposed to something productive like solving the hunger crisis or destroying capitalism from its underbelly up), I come across a plethora of things that make no got doggone sense.  And of course the majority of these things come from places where people get to share their opinions and thoughts with no inhibitions…aka Twitter. One thing I’ve seen multiple times is people “setting other folks straight” about how Pharaohs, and pyramids, and whatnot were from Egypt, not Africa….

So we really didn’t know Egypt was in Africa?

Is our education system failing our youth THAT much?!

I mean I knew things were tough out’chea in these streets but I didn’t know they were so rough that we can’t afford maps and globes for our classrooms. I mean come on! Egypt is as African as African can get. Wanna know why? because it’s right at the top of FREAKING AFRICA!!!!

*takes breath, does a quick whoo-sa, composes self, puts bougie hat back on*

Anyway, so just in case you didn’t know, yes Egypt  (and Libya) is in Africa. This lack of common knowledge inspired this post. Here are a couple of things I believe the rest of the world should be aware of just in case they didn’t know. Instead of posting a series of cliche’ tweets and hoping the message gets out through various retweets I’m gonna list some of my top nuggets of wisdom that I would like to share with the world (and by nuggets of wisdom I mean things I think are important)!

Everyone Is Not What They Seem (Literally)

I am a makeup fiend. I love wearing makeup, buying makeup, and watching other people do makeup. The more I learned about makeup, the more I realized that the art of makeup is about illusion. You can literally change the shape of your face with a few well-placed strokes of a blush brush and some contour powder. You can make impurities vanish in a matter of seconds with some good coverage concealer. I’m sure men have their own ways of grooming themselves and shaping their appearance but since I know so much about the art of illusion that is makeup I now believe that you can never say you LOVE the way someone looks until you’ve seen them fresh out of bed when they’re brushing their teeth and still look like the struggle (because EVERYONE looks like the struggle fresh out of bed).

If You Say Something Offensive People Are Likely To Get Offended 

I have literally tweeted this sentence so many times that I am shocked twitter hasn’t stopped me from tweeting it because I’ve repeated it so often. The more educated I become the more I realize the different ways things can be interpreted….and the more I see most of those interpretations are offensive. Here’s the thing about offense: you can’t regulate when people are going to get offended and you can’t tell folks how to feel once they are offended.If I feel something is racist or sexist or just plain wrong don’t spend the next three hours trying to convince me on why I shouldn’t have been offended in the first place. Just because you weren’t offended doesn’t mean the original act wasn’t offensive. It just wasn’t offense to you.

Take for example The Oscars. Seth McFarlane said some pretty offensive things. A lot of his jokes easily fell into either the racist or sexist category and a lot of people were offended. Of course, people came to his defense saying that “if you were offended by his jokes then there was clearly something wrong with YOU. And I mean it was all in good fun, right? So lighten up!” To which my response was ‘ha ha hell’(By the way humor/satire is never a valid excuse). The best reaction to when someone has been offended by your words or actions, whether they were looking to be offended or not, is to explain what you meant and if they accept it then so be it, if not well there ya go.

WIth that being said, if you do something with the intent to tick people off like calling a 9-year old an inappropriate name or making a stupid generalization about people don’t be shocked when folks get all up in your grill about it. If you tweet “Long live the Klan! May they always keep the foreigners in check!” Don’t be surprised when the Race Police and various other people with common sense write you strongly worded emails and whatnot.

You Shouldn’t Start An Argument You Are Not Willing to Finish

This point is the main reason most things on my Facebook feed go unchecked because I know I don’t have the time or patience to get into a social media argument, and you may call me pansy for it but I just ain’t got time for virtual arguments. That being said, do not start a debate or argument (whether via interent or in real life) that you have no means or intent to finish. That means if I post a statistic about how sexist America is and how women are abused across the world don’t you comment on it with “that aint’ true” and then when I reply to you with data to support my statement, don’t you reply with “*kanye shrug*”. You had no basis for your contradiction and then wasn’t even willing to engage in a discussion about it. This goes along with the age old African American Proverb,”Won’t start no stuff, won’t be no stuff”. Meaning don’t start something you can’t finish and if you do, don’t be surprised when your pride gets served to you on a platinum-encrusted platter.

Support Does Not Equal Correct

Just because people support your movement or your opinion, it doesn’t make it right. Don’t believe me? Here are a few examples of movements that had wide support but were still dead wrong:

The Ku Klux Klan, The Nazi Party, The Prohibitionists, The Ancient Romans, them folks who drank the Kool-Aid on that island with Jim Jones (not the rapper), People who believe reality TV is the answer, Satanists…the list goes on and on.

The Internet is a wonderful tool that lets people from around the world connect and express their ideas which means you could literally find a support group for ANYTHING. I dare you to type in the most random thing possible and bet you find a forum or discussion on it. This easy access means that not all support is good support and just because you got people to back you up doesn’t mean you deserve to be backed up. And if you EVER come at someone sideways about something completely irrational JUST BECAUSE there are five other people who agree with you don’t be surprised if this happens:

I’m Just Saying

The More Your True Light Shines,  The Higher the Chances of Unpopularity Becomes

This has taken me a while to see but it’s true. The more you do what you are called to do, the purpose God has set out for you, the more likely you are to be seen as an outcast. Not saying that you can’t do yo’ thang and have all the friends and supporters in the world just saying there’s a chance that you won’t always be held in high regard because of it. For example, say you have a passion for race relations and following Christ. The more truth you share about God’s word or about the racist nature of the nation you live in, the more likely you are to make a few non-fans (non-fans are the opposite of fans, but not quite enemies). But even if that happens still do what you were called to do because if it’s clearly your purpose you won’t need the fake support anyway!

Let your light shine loves!

Let me know any major lessons the world needs to learn! I love seeing your comments and hearing your awesome words!

-Brini-Weenie aka Briizy aka @kewl_briize aka look at that brand new 23-yr old!

SHOUTOUT TIME (A few of my favorite Bloggers who are all about posting awesome things)

BronzeSugar, MasterTeacher, Ally Helmuth, Rhody and Stalkee

“God’s gifts of grace come in many forms. Each of you has recieved a gift in order to serve others. You should use it faithfully. If you speak, you should do it like one speaking God’s very words. If you serve, you should do it with the strength God provides. Then in all tings God will be praised through Jesus Christ. Give him the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.”-1 Peter 4:10-11

 

 

Black Privilege (The Fried Chicken and Watermelon Legacy)

Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by any discussion of race that doesn’t end in “let’s all hold hands and share love across the world because in the end we’re all one race:the human race” then stop reading this now. If you just so happen to not be Black and are deeply disturbed by the thought of any people other than White people carrying privilege in the US, you too should close the browser page now. If you are Black and also are uncomfortable with this notion,  you need to first close this page THEN go evaluate your life and realize you are Black in America. If you do not enjoy an outpouring of Black pride, run in the polar OPPOSITE direction of this post…everyone else, enjoy yourself. 

If you didn’t know this I’m Black.

Have been all my days and, from what I understand, will be the rest of my days. I love fried chicken and watermelon *gasp*, yes I said it, I love fried chicken and watermelon. Why? Because fried chicken is delicious and was clearly crafted by the hands of the one true God himself. Watermelon is a delectable, nutritious treat that has all type of health benefits and is the perfect fruit to cool one off in the horrid heat of summer. Well why does this matter because the Black being and fried chicken/watermelon has been historically linked and more times than not it’s been a negative link. Why, you ask, would anyone have an issue with food being associated with a race?

Well probably because of this:

Problem

..even bigger problem

 

 

 

 

 

 

Both of these pictures portray a degradation of the Negro to a less than functioning normal human being. I once was trying to pick what to order at a restaurant on a school trip, where I was of course the only person of color, and when I told a guy standing next to me that I think I’ll have the fried chicken meal (it was quick, cheap, and the only thing I trusted on the menu, honestly) he giggled and said to me “how stereotypical” and proceeded to continue laughing as if he wanted me to join in on his oh so clever joke

…..I gave him no laughs.

Clearly

Anyways, there are several things in my life that I do, not because I’m Black, but because I just have a personal preference for them. I know plenty Black people who hate fried chicken and watermelon because they just don’t enjoy the taste of them.

BUT there also things that come with the territory of being Black in America that I’m quite pleased with and here’s a list of some of them. Mind you I’m not saying all Blacks do, or like, these things, or anything…I’m not speaking for my entire race because last time I checked there was about a millon katrillion Black people in the world and at the last “Who’s Gonna Speak for Black Folks This Year” convention I was not appointed the title. 

I can walk out of most awkward situations scot free

Any one who knows me in person, knows that I can be hella awkward. I remember one time my brother introduced me to a friend of his and for some reason I got distracted and forgot how to respond to the person he was introducing me to so I just stood there for like ten whole seconds, smiling nervously and not saying anything until my brother finished his introduction of me by saying “…and she’s awkward.” But I noticed that in the majority of awkward situations I am in, even if the awkwardness is mostly my fault, most people of other races don’t acknowledge me as the source and even if they do then I become the awkward Black girl which is now a thing since Issa Rae went and made it all popular. I’m not sure why, maybe it’s because my swagga is on a trillion all the time and therefore people overlook my moment of awkward or they assume I’m naturally cool (cuz Black folks are cool) and that this was only a exceptional case in which I had a moment’s slip up from my usual coolness. Either way, it works out.

I Get To Pull The Race Card….

…because most situations are racist.

Being a Sociology Graduate Student and having an emphasis in race, I’ve learned all kinds of different ways racism runs through the very vein of America (if you don’t believe me, google redlining, the KKK, Manifest Destiny, lynching, Trayvon Martin, Mass Incarceration, the Trail of Tears, American Slavery, etc.). So once you open your eyes and see how racism has been institutionalized in America you start to see how everything from popular music to hiring practices to real estate discrimination to beauty standards are actually really, really racist. And of course if you’re in America and not White you are probably the one being discriminated against. That being said, I’m not one for pulling the race card very much (not because it’s not valid but because most people won’t listen to you even if you do) but in some cases, like my mother being passed over by service clerks in department/upscale stores because her hair is always in two-strand twists and she doesn’t look affluent , I will pull that bad boy out in a heartbeat.

I Get To Watch My Brothers in The Struggle Showboat Like No Other

Football season is one of the single most glorious times of my year. Nothing like watching folks throw the pigskin around while munching on some delicious finger food. As much as I love the sport I do enjoy a good showboat after a great play. If you don’t know what show boating looks like, here ya go:

Look at me dancing on your hope and dreams

The great showboaters of football, Deion Sanders, T.O. (and now Jacoby Jones), have all been Black  and I must say I’m proud! Although some may call this behavior arrogant, I think if you are a boss and you do incredible feats of athleticism you get to do victory dances. The above gif is of Jacoby Jones, Baltimore Ravens player from New Orleans, at the Super Bowl this past Sunday doing a classic New Orleans dance, the Beenie Weenie. Although all these players earned their fame by their incredible skills, I comrade them on their awesome actions of showboating. Plus no one is gonna question a Black man in an end zone doing the dougie, you may not like it, but ain’t nobody gonna step to him.

My People’s Food Will Change Your Life

I have been to Europe and have been to various states around the country and up to this point in my life I can truly say that there has been no greater tasting food than food made by Black people aka Soul Food. You can diss it for its extreme unhealthiness all you want, but I bet you get a taste of my mama’s red beans and fried chicken you’d be ready to sell your house and your firstborn for another bite. Yes most Soul Food will kill you if you eat it everyday, but ain’t nobody said you supposed to be throwing back whole ham-hocks covered in lard  five times a week. If you do that and have a massive heart attack which only worsens your diabetes do not call me.  As healthy and fit as I try to be,  I will throw a salad out the window for some good collard greens and porkchops.

 No One is Hassling Me To Be Stick Thin

The Black woman is known for her hips and thighs. Black women have always been known for that because hey that’s just the way we’re built. And even though for centuries Black women were vilified for having such large derrieres and healthy bosoms, every one knows they were just hating. I’m 5’5” and around 135 pounds which is pretty average for me but thanks to my mama and ‘em I got some hips, which I love because Black culture is one that celebrates the heavy chested and the big booty guhs alike. I don’t feel perpetual pressure to become a size zero. When i watch the Victoria Secret fashion show I hav n0 desire to take a lap around the greater DC area.  Actually when I was younger, and was super skinny, I used to pray for the day when I would fill out a pair of jeans properly because I wanted to be big fine like all the other girls. And the day I got a little weight and some curves I was like :

Men have written odes to the Black woman’s physique (i.e. Sir Mix A Lot, 2Chainz) and to that I say huzzah! I mean yes some of these songs are completely misogynistic and should never be heard by any child ever, but let’s just ignore that for a second and give them an A for effort.

Our Music

I mean Black people have made GINORMOUS contributions to music across the world. We got jazz, hip hop, blues, soul, neo-soul, R & B, rock and roll. All these genres are inseparable from the legacy of Black people. We have rhythm in our spirit, from our dance moves(and yes I’m aware there are Black folk with no rhythm) to our voices to our swagger, we are some musical folks. Trace it all the way back to Africa or the various islands we’ve been dispersed to, we are some grooving people and I’m super proud of that cultural background.

Look at all that cultural excellence.

Perseverance Is Basically Built Into Our History

We survived slavery and Jim Crow and we’re still here….enough said.

Well guys that’s all I got for this post. I’d love to hear what you love about your race or what privileges you get because of it, whether you’re Black, Latino, White, Asian, or East Sudanese, I’d love to hear it.

Happy Black People Being Great Month,

-Brini Weenie aka the Briister, aka @kewl_briize

“He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield, in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples under me.”-Psalm 144:2

 

We’ve All Gone Mad [Why me and Don Draper ain't vibing]

The NAACP Image Awards were filmed recently and I know they’re going to air in the next week or so but of course a majority of the highlights are already on Youtube. As I was perusing the various clips I came across one of Kerry Washington being honored for her political activism and I was like “Go on head Kerry you be active in your democracy and whatnot.” Only thing that made this clip better was that it was presented to her by the President of the NAACP, Benjamin Todd Jealous (if you never seen him he’s this light skinned fellow here)…

Look at our borther in the struggle

….And the oh so fabulous Diahann CaroLl. I’m sure not many of you know this but I love Diahann Carol if for nothing more than her ability to look like she just stepped off a runway ALL THE TIME. The woman is flawless and her hair(her famous wigs) is perpetually LAID like no other. The woman is 77 years old and she looks like this..

Bow down to her majesty

…oh and she’s a wonderful actor.

Look at her, looking like enlightenment

Back to Kerry and ‘em. So as they were giving their talk about why Ms. Washington is so awesome they pointed out that she is the first Black woman to lead in a primetime television show in over 40 years. The last Black woman to do it was who? Diahann Carroll. She played a nurse who was also a widowed single mother in the series Julia. The show was a big deal not just because Diahann Carroll was a black woman on tv, but she was a Black woman on tv who wasn’t a mammy or a domestic.  The series ended in 1971 meaning that its been 41 years since a Black woman has led a series on primetime tv.

 

Really 41 whole years?

 

Props to Kerry and Shonda Rhimes (creator of Scandal) for breaking the color line and fulfilling the dream and wading in the water( and all the things that go along with being Black and great) but why in the hell has it been 41 years since a Black woman has led a primetime TV show?! I mean that’s very long. So you mean to tell me there wasn’t n’an a Black woman that could lead  a show that people would want to watch. And yes there are many more male-lead shows than female lead shows as a whole but I can think of three shows off the top of my head that has non women of color leads. So although this may be a gender issue, it’s defitely a race issue as well.

This absence of Black leading ladies (and for the most part gents also) is appalling and it brings me back to a thought I had about a popular tv show back when I was trying to force myself to love this show that EVERY ONE (read: white people I follow on facebook) else seems to just adore. I’ve been trying to get into Mad Men for over a year and for some reason I just could not connect with ANY of the characters probably because it took five hundred episodes for anything life changing and important to happen. AND Betty Draper annoys me to the core.

But I think another reason I could never get into it was because there were no black people in it besides the janitor and the elevator operator (which is mostly historically realistic since it’s set in the 60s). I didn’t expect there to be many black folks because well where on tv (besides reality shows and BET) ARE there many Black people. Especially black people that aren’t purely comedic relief, severely emasculated, or extremely angry and militant? But I guess what I really couldn’t get past with Mad Men is that while these characters are running round drinking, whoring, and making crap tons of money black people were basically fighting for the right to live decent lives without being lynched, shot, or arrested.

Guess it’s personal because during that time my mother and her siblings were going to school and watching Dr. King and Brother Malcolm and the Kennedys on TV. And yes they do make references to the Civil RIghts Movement and the assassination of the President in the show, I even hear there’s a colored on there now who’s actually important, but I just can’t seem to pull myself to be invested in the lives of these superficial human beings while folks were fighting real struggles, particularly MY folks.

I always wonder how my mom felt, sitting in the front of the family tv in their apt in the projects, with her brothers and sisters watching shows like Leave It To Beaver and Bonanza and all these other shows where white, middle class families enjoyed these perfect, drama-free, color-free, struggle-free lives while people were somewhere marching and protesting in order to get equal rights for her race. I’m not trying to down Mad Men or take anything from it, I just realize that it’s prob a show I will probably never be able to get fully into (plus it’s beyond boring to me).

It’s awesome to see Kerry Washington leading a popular tv show with a super dedicated fan base but hopefully we don’t have to wait another 41 years to get a black woman as a lead on a primetime tv show.

So let me know, do you think it makes sense that it’s been 41 years since a primetime tv show had a Black female lead? Or do you think that’s just the way the cookie crumbles in Hollywood? Any particular group you would like to see better represented on the TV?

Stay strong in the Struggle,

-Bri

“You do well in everything else. You do well in faith and in speaking. You do well in knowledge and in complete commitment. And you do well in your love for us so make sure that you also do well in the grace of giving to others”-2 Corinthians 8:7

 

On anti-twitter island (the happenings of my 21-dayfast)

You all: Hey Bri i’m so glad you have been keeping up with your blog and being consistent with your blog.

Me: My bad…

So I know I’ve been MIA from my blog and whatnot but before you give me a “didn’t you say you would post regularly every month” talking-to, I had a good reason to go missing this time. Unlike my regular blogging lapses due to business with school, or life, or just pure laziness and procrastination, I stayed from the blogosphere this time because I was partaking in a 21-day fast with my church (shout out to all the Franklinites who made it all 21 days).

So every year my church has a 21 day fast at the start of the year, this year I decided to fast from eating till noon and I gave up listening to non-Christian music and social media. Yes, all social media. That means no twitter, no Facebook, no Instagram, and no blogging on my beloved blog. First couple of days was rough. So many things I wanted to take pictures of and share with you all, so many social commentaries I wanted to share on twitter…but after the first week it because more and more refreshing to not be so bound by the trivialities of the social media world and it was awesome to spend more time focusing on God and meditating on his word. I’m currently still studying the book of Jeremiah, wonderful read about God’s people turning away from him. Since there was a ton of things that occurred during the fast that I couldn’t share with everyone, I’m gonna share them now. So strap in for a whirlwind tour of my January up to this point.

Chopped off all my relaxed hair.

Yes party people I am currently rocking a teeny weeny Afro because I had all my relaxed hair cut off . I am fully natural and I can say I honestly love it. Currently no hassle with styling my hair because I only have about four tightly coiled inches of it.

See! I’m Free From The Relaxer!

I’ve noticed I’ve picked up some new habits nthat I am officially all natural. One being that I now obsessively natural hair bloggers and tutorials on YouTube. I’m always like “Ooh I can’t wait till my hair grows out long enough, so I can twist it this way and that and then do this blow out and then be fabulous.” Another one Is that I now secretly ogle other naturals’ gorgeous hair. Being in the DMV, I see plenty of fellow naturals on the metro and whenever I notice someone with a particularly fierce natural style I’m like:

 

I also now have even more amped up daily self empowerment sessions where I stand in the mirror and hit my dougie of self esteem and encouragement. And then I walk out the door like,

 

Went To The Inauguration

Alright, I don’t know if you know this but I love me some first family. It’s almost a problem but whatever. A cousin of mine offered me an extra ticket they had so I decided to participate in the hoopla and such. And it was awesome to see all the happenings and whatnot live. And can I say, I lived for Madame First Lady’s and the first daughters’ coats. I love me a great peacoat. Of course President looked great too, but the Obama women were everything. Even Grandmama Robinson had her color coordination going. I mean those gloves that the FLOTUS had on,come on! I dang near fell out. Another thing about the inauguration is that standing in 40 degree weather for five hours has a tendency to suck. I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything because come on, its a tradition that’s been going on for over a century and I got free ticket to it, heck I appreciate it BUT I was not about that “I’m clearly slowly dying from the outside in because all my appendages are slowly freezing off” life. I was layered from head to toe y’all: gloves, thermals, scarf, ear muff-headband thing under a hat. And it was not a game out there. Folks were huddled in heat groups, laid out under trees, on the ground under a blanket, jogging in place to keep their feet awake….not a game, never again.

Started An All Natural Frenzy

So now that my hair is all natural I, of course, had to start practicing more organic living in other areas of my health care. So now I’m trying all kinds of do it yourself stuff like natural exfoliant face scrubs and masks and more healthy choices in the food department. Because contrary to what some people, myself included, believe everything DOESN’T have to be double deep fried and covered in fat and grease. Actually most things shouldn’t be….because you know that can kill you. Like you will most likely actually die in fat joe fashion due to your heart just quitting and finally succumbing to the grease and lard that coats your arteries and has found someway to poison your blood. Just saying. If ya want to see any of my ideas and comments about the different initiatives I’m getting into see my tumblr and i’ll start posting reviews on there.

Realized How Pointless and Stupid Most of the Shows I Watch Are

As you know I am always on the lookout for the newest form of ratchetry and how to stop it, so in order to be effective in my mission to eradicate it from all cities, states, and nations I must be well versed in the various forms of ratchetry out here in these streets. Best way to do that? Watch reality tv.

Well I’ve learned that the reason I’m able to make it through most of these shows is that I have a few other people who watch it too and can co-commentate on every thing that happens. And by a few other people I mean like 400 other people….on twitter. The social commentary that happens on my TL whenever any particularly big event/large display of ratchetness happens is phenomenal and it’s like one big perpetual roast fest. I love it.

Only thing is when you take away the 400 other people and it’s just me watching stuff alone, things get a little less entertaining. Actually they just get unnecessarily dumb. It’s like seeing something real weird and just standing there and watching it. Soon you realize there’s nobody to gawk with you so you just stop watching…because it’s stupid.

So that’s pretty much the biggest things that’s gone down since the 2nd of January. Any big happenings in y’all life since the beginning of the year? Any awesome New Year’s Resolutions? I wanna hear them all! Much Love!!

-Bri aka Briizy aka Brini Weenie

“Respect is not requested. 

 Respect is earned.

First you sow an investment,

Then you reap a return.

If you chill you’ll be cool.

If you fume you’ll get burned.

‘Cause flattery is free,

But respect is earned.”

Good stuff right?

That’s a poem from my big bro, Erick Brown. If you’re interested in more of his poetic works you can cop his book here! You won’t regret it I promise.

“You do well in everything else. You do well in faith and
in speaking. You do well in knowledge and in complete commitment.
And you do well in your live for us. So make sure that you also do
well in the grace of giving to others.”-2 Corinthians
8:7.

 

Ignorance Is Bliss (and other adages I think are wack wack)

Oh Clichés!

You know, those wonderful phrases that some person, who doesn’t actually have a valid answer for your problem, offers up to give you some type of direction. Although they can be very well intentioned, after hearing “There’s plenty more fish in the sea” after your latest breakup for the twentieth time I’m sure you wanna slap somebody. So of course I had to make a list of all the phrases, clichés, and adages that either conjure an eye roll or side eye from me whenever I hear them.

Ignorance Is Bliss

Ignorane is not bliss. Being completely unaware of things that are possibly vital to your survival and existence can never be blissful. I usually hear this when someone finds out some one they love and or care about has done something particularly sheisty.

For example, Joe finds out that for the entirety of his relationship with Ariel she was working the pole under the pseudonym Chocolate Cheeks. Prior to knowing she was an exotic dancer, he thought she was the most magnificent creature to step onto the face of the Earth. But now that he knows she shakes it like a salt shaker for money his heart is destroyed and his life is in a perpetual shade of gray. This is usually where he thinks his life was so much better before he knew, and by better he means when he was living a lie. Wouldn’t it be better to know that you’re girlfriend, or boyfriend for the vice versa, works the silver column now before you marry them and find out years later that the majority of the income came in singles and fives? The truth is always better than a lie or being blind to the truth.

Kissing Someone Who Smokes is Like Kissing An Ashtray

This phrase hasn’t gotten much play in the recent years but when i was younger there was an anti-smoking campaign that had this as its tagline. For years I believed that I would never kiss someone who smoked because it would be exactly like licking an ashtray…FALSE. Not like I have much experience with kissing people who smoke but still. I just hate when people make these far fetched parallels to make a point.

Wanna know what is like kissing an ashtray??

….Kissing an Ashtray.

That’s about it.

Reverse Racism

Being in the field of sociology I talk about racism a lot. I mean A LOT, A LOT. We discuss all the ways racism, both overt and institutional, affects the way America runs. All my fellow colleagues tend to have a good grip on the prevalence of racism and how those with privilege can’t ignore the voices of millions who say everyday that their lives are affected by their race. Which is awesome, but then there are others who believe in reverse racism. If you don’t know what reverse racism is, it’s a phrase used to describe the reverse of the traditional white on black discrimination.

Usually I hear it like this- White Person:”OMG, my friend got called a cracker while walking through this low-income neighborhood. Bet you won’t hear that on the news, no they’re too busy talking about Jordan Davis and Trayvon Martin, no one ever wants to talk about reverse racism!”

You’re right no one ever talks about it…because it doesn’t exist!

The word Racism means ANY discrimination on the basis of race. Webster defines it as “a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race; racial prejudice or discrimination.”  The reverse of front is the back, like in the cha cha slide when the guy yells “REVERSE REVERSE!” But There is no reverse of discrimination. Saying that blacks discriminating against whites is the reverse of “traditional” or “ordinary” racism implies that whites are the only ones who can engage in racism…which is false. Not saying that white racists don’t tend to have a bit more cultural weight than black or hispanic racists but to imply that only whites can BE racists and that only blacks can be the object of racism makes you ignorant. Plus reverse racism never has the same effect as “traditional” racism because everyone knows that a white person in America is way more likely to get justice if he is discriminated against than non-whites (but that’s another topic for another blog post)..And if you EVER happen to use this phrase in my presence, please expect this response:

…Just Like Slavery

I’ve heard this one SEVERAL times over my years. Every time some group of people or some person is disadvantaged people like to parallel this trouble to American Slavery. I once heard of people from PETA comparing the entrapment of Whales or dolphins or something to slavery. Really? The entrapment of ANIMALS is comparable to the mass displacement of millions of people and the following century of disenfranchisement and abuse of said people. Here’s an article about PETA and their tactics. If you ever have the urge to EVER compare anything to slavery….don’t! Just don’t. There is nothing comparable to Slavery. NOTHING. There is only one exception about something that can be compared slavery…

…it’s more slavery.

Shake It Like A Sleigh Bell

This phrase isn’t an old one but I discovered this one on Twitter. The tweet read “Shake It Like A Sleigh Bell: Download the Christmas Bounce 2012 Mixtape.” Aww Lawd these heathens done took over Christmas. I will NOT twerk in celebration of the birth of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Is there nothing sacred anymore? Can we not have one holiday where folks ain’t bent over and shaking it like they mean it? I just cannot with my people, oh my New Orleans people!

This was my intial reaction

I have yet to hear it, I mean but really? I’m assuming that the various artists of the city have gotten together to put a bounce beat behind Christmas carols…I just I cannot. I just. No words. I quit.

Well that’s all folks! Are there any phrases you’re tired of hearing or never properly understood? I’d love to hear them! Comment and let me know what they are.

Much love,

Briizy Bri

“The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee”-Jeremiah 31:3